Hoffie

My grades have to and WILL get better. No more excuses. I’m not accepting my GPA. It’s not a bad GPA, not bad at all, but I always feel the pressure to be better, to do more. It’s probably not always a good kind of pressure, but it’s what motivates me. I have to do this. Marching Band is officially over, which means I have a ton of extra time on my hands. This will be for schoolwork. I can do it. I WILL do it! <3

Brooke came home! :) Chilled with her most of the day after going to the school to turn in my Voice of Democracy paper. We caught up, went to M-Dogs, left an odd note in Trevor’s car, walked around my neighborhood, and chilllled. I needed it. I missed her in my life! Later we went to BDubs with Trev, and after that, Trev and I saw “Teeth,” which was probably one of the stupidest movies I’ve ever seen in my life. It didn’t matter; we were in good company. Hoping I can have the focus to get my work done tomorrow before Halloween on Sunday. <3

OH AND- 
I have a new student who is friends with Bella. Her name’s Maddie, and I’m excited. Teaching makes me happyyyy. 

I can work harder. I can make things right and feel better again. I can do this. <3

I will do this. 

GRADES ARE FINALLY IMPROVING! YESSSSS <3

Awesome concert tonight. We worked out the crazy scheduling and made everything run smoothly! Great job, everyone. Super proud of each of you, and especially Amanda Dahlem, Trevor Olsen, and Jordan Jones. Your solos were beeeauuuutiful. ;)

<3 I love performing.

IMEA in about two weeks. Tomorrow is Thursday which means Jazz, dinner with Trev, and no school Friday. Hellll to the yes. 

but I pretty much dislike everything else about school. Stress and I do not get along. 15 hours straight spent at school are just not good for anyone. 

I appreciate my friends and boyfriend so much. They get me through everything. Same goes for music. Community Band and Swing Band were a blast. Trevor makes me happy <3

(sigh) Zero hour tomorrow and an AP Bio test. I could use a break. Good night.

Well, the season is officially over and done with. Our last performance for competition was today at ISU, the home of so many dear memories in my life.

I had a great time today at state, as I knew I would. Spent the day with good friends and saw old friends from DMA or previous competitions. It was so nice to be around the group of people that I feel I belong with the most. As we arrived after our 3 hour bus ride, we had a rocky start to our rehearsals. The weather was not looking promising at all (it began to rain during our warmup) and our guide told us there was a possibility of weather delaying our performance. However, we continued to practice and pushed through it. After our physical warmup, we marched over to the gate, and eventually onto the field after removing our soaked ponchos off of our uniforms and instruments. As soon as we marched on, we were marched off by our guide due to a weather delay. Inside by the track is where we waited for two and a half hours before we finally performed in decent-looking weather. Our performance ended strong, and the crowd enjoyed it. I was proud. We all were.

The Marching Sequoits have only helped me to create more of those wonderful memories. I’m proud of each and every single one of you who stuck through this tough season. We had a lot riding against us- more than most bands tend to have. We rose up, though, and overcame those obstacles. I congratulate you all for completing this year of the Marching Sequoits. It’s been fun, it’s been difficult, and it’s been lifechanging, as marching band should be. I’m honored to be one of the Drum Majors of this ensemble, and I can’t wait until next year’s season, because I know it’ll only get better from here.

<3

It started with the “You Make a Difference Breakfast,” and Riggs recognized all of the section leaders, DMs, plus Ryan Schaefer. ;) It was nice to see that he thought we were doing a fine job as leaders in marching band. It was ALSO interesting to hear Schoenfelder’s compliment to the “Band Majors” (that man is so musically challenged..) about how great we sounded at the football games this year. Hey, it was a compliment nonetheless.

Advanced Wind, as it always is on Thursdays, was a total bore. It’s not that I don’t respect Mrs. White, but as a musician, her knowledge iiiiisn’t exactly up to par with the musicians in the band. I love flute, and I love band, but I don’t love them when Mrs. White conducts a rehearsal, makes simple mistakes, and then blames the ensemble for them. I got mad at people talking, as well; I wasn’t necessarily mad at you, FYI, merely frustrated with the amount of blatant disrespect that is shown towards Mrs. White during those Thursday’s hectic practices. ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, THOUGH, she let us practice Jazz for the last fifteen minutes. Alto Sax never fails to make me happy.

At the end of the day was Academic Team. The first practice: fun as always! It should be a good year.

And then there was Jazz Band. :) Oh, how I missed it. How we all missed it. Today was the first real rehearsal. I was fortunate enough to play on Coombs’s vintage-lacquered professional level alto. It. Was. Beautiful. I had never played on a more beautiful instrument in my life, and I’ve played some beautiful ones. It felt great to be in that kind of setting again, with Stolfe as my director, and with the other talented musicians that are love it just as much as I do.

Marching Band had our last official performance of the season. It’s bittersweet, but we ended strong, and I can’t put into words how proud I am of all of them. They’ve all pulled through a tough year with many changes, and they deserve recognition for that. I love ‘em all. I really do. Their dedication has brought us to a nice close to the season, and we’ll see how we do at state on Saturday. I don’t care if we place, I don’t even care who’s in our class. All I care about is leaving it all out there on the field, and having ISU be our best performance. For GNP. For Bush. For Stolfe. For Hayes. For Riggs. For us. The band.

<3

“I’m just one motherfucker singin’ proud.” -Jason Mraz

I’m psyched for a lot of things. Making IMEA has made me realize that on top of all the stress, I can still pull through with music. However, it doesn’t give me reason to slack off. I WILL get back on the bandwagon. (Awful, awful pun.) I will go back to lessons, no matter who they’re with. I have to get going again. I want to get going again.

Jazz is starting, Marching Band is coming to a close, All-State is still running, and I’m finding out what chair I have for IMEA any day now.

I can pull through.

I’ve also made the decision to drop AP Biology at the end of the semester. I just have to email Langenkamp and that’ll be done. I spend way too much time for that class to possibly be good for me; I have other things going on that deserve my energy more.

On another note, I miss my friends a lot. I see some of them all the time in marching band and saw some others at homecoming, which was great, but I miss hanging out with them like summer allowed me to. I’ve barely been home, too. Both of my brothers were home this past weekend and I did not see them AT ALL. :( 

I need a life again! Marching Band, I love you, but I can’t wait until you’re over.

<3

I wouldn’t have rather gone with anyone else. Best homecoming so far, hands down. Tonight couldn’t have been more perfect. You’re wonderful, our friends our wonderful, and I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time. Tonight was pure bliss; I needed it. I’m so happy to be with you, babe. 101610

Homecoming game. We killed ‘em. 48-0. Yay, Sequoits!

Iza came home. <3 <3 <3 I needed her. I don’t know if she’ll read this, but she understands me in a way that no one else can. We just get each other. I aspire to be like her. She’s one of the people who got me started when I needed that push as a little kid. She’s taught me to never give up on my music. I never will. 

Homecoming tomorrow with a wonderful date. Can’t wait. :)

Had a long talk with this man tonight. He was the grand marshall at our homecoming parade, and a large crowd and I rushed him as he was walking to the pep rally.

The inspiration of my life. He’s the reason I became a musician in the first place. That man has pushed me since the fifth grade when I met him. For years, he’s inspired, educated, and helped so many to become something bigger and better than they ever dreamed of. His band was never just “middle school kids” to him. He saw us in a professional way, and expected up to live and play up to our fullest potential. As a result of his strict manners, our middle school band was second to none in the country. Not only was this man musically talented, but he was an optimistic person. He believed in people and he believed in making an impact on peoples lives through being a music educator. If I can change one life in the way Bush has changed many, I will die happy.

“Never settle for mediocrity.” 
You will be missed in the music world, but you’ll never be far. I hope we stay in touch. :) 

Sometimes I wish you’d be proud of me. I wish I could talk to you about things. I try to do what I can to make you happy and it never feels like enough. You’re never satisfied… Things changed since the summer and I thought it’d be a good thing. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it’s great, but sometimes I feel like you don’t see how hard I try just to get the slightest bit of attention from you. I wish you saw it through my eyes. Not only as a person, but as a musician. I know music isn’t something you necessarily understand, but knowing that I make you happy in general would be nice.

For Bernie- Thank you. I haven’t known you very long, but you’re helping me out with so many things. Your guidance has been much needed and well received. You’re phenomenal at what you do, and I’m glad I have the privilege of working with you in All State. I can see you love what you do and I aspire to be a musician and director much like yourself.

For Stolfe- You’re awesome. I always call you my musical dad. You’re always there, you’re always pushing me to become better, and I can never thank you enough. You’ll be a wonderful band director someday. Working with you makes music special, fun, and I’m always learning from you.

I’m not sure how I feel about IMEA. I’m not being pessimistic or hard on myself, I feel that I’m being realistic. Seeing that they only take a specific number of kids from each school, I don’t know that I’ll be one of those people this year. I feel pretty lost right now, like I’m missing something. I miss lessons a lot. All State makes me feel better, but I’m still worried that I’m not taking steady lessons. I just don’t know what the next step is. I feel pressured about college and school and extracurriculars, I just don’t know where to turn or what to do. Maybe I’m complaining, maybe I’m overreacting; I’m not sure. Sometimes I feel like no one wants to listen, and sometimes I don’t blame them.

I miss summer.

Sometimes things are hard. Sometimes you get down. Sometimes you realize you’re wrong.

But sometimes you can say sorry, and sometimes you find people who make you feel just a little bit lighter. 

IMEA tomorrow.

It’s been a hectic weekend, and it’s not over yet. But a LOT has happened so far.

All State, as always, is a blast. The music and message of the musical is truly moving. Sondheim’s phenomenal. It feels great to reunite with the pit and see my fellow members of this awesome show after an entire month. Everything with All State is going well, as it blossoms into something much bigger and better than any of us ever imagined. It keeps getting better. Just when we think it couldn’t get any more complex, a new element of the show is discovered. But, I won’t reveal too much, I could get in trouble. :) Some of you will just have to come see it for yourselves.

As for our marching band.

My Dearest Marching Sequoits, I’m so proud. I got to rehearsal late because of All State and was greeted by all of those who had been at rehearsal for an entire day already. It was great to see the band getting ready to go. We then did a small marching warm up before we moved to a field for a more proper rehearsal. After a few runs through the last movement, we head over to the field. Our show began with dedications from our friends from DMA, who happened to be the host Drum Majors from Marengo, who made a note about GNP in our dedication. Then it was time for our show. Some of us, including myself, were hesitant about this performance. Our rehearsal lacked focus and many of the leaders didn’t understand why. Something felt different. Perhaps it was because I wasn’t at rehearsal to practice my conducting that morning, but something about our show felt strange. However, we got through it and it hit. It clicked. Most of the tempo tears that usually happened were a thing of the past. We stepped it up a notch. The third movement dance was executed well, and the crowd loved it. We performed. We felt good. We took a picture, watched a couple bands, and then the Drum Majors head over for awards after watching the Marengo Exhibition Show, which was also dedicated to GNP.

We first sat through the emcee trying to stall for time, announcing which schools had different uniforms (ours and Sandwich’s) and he began to drag on. Finally, when the judge’s scores were in, the mood again changed. We sat through the Class A awards, and then came the Class AA.

Best Marching: Antioch
Best Winds: Sycamore
Best Drum Major: Sycamore
Best Colorguard: Sycamore
Best Percussion: Rochelle

We had it in our heads: Sycamore won, and we had to have had second or third, right? According to the caption awards, it was the only thing that made sense.

Emcee: And now, for our placement awards for Class AA.
Crowd: (tense)
Emcee: Third place, Rochelle High School!

At this point, we figured we had second.

Emcee: Second place, Sycamore High School!

The reaction- Wait, what?

Emcee: First place, Antioch High School!

We stepped forward, saluted our good friends from DMA, gave them giant hugs, took pictures, and received our first place award. It felt right. Afterwards, each of our DMs picked up a trophy (we received a participation award, as well) and walked over towards the buses. As I turned the corner, I wasn’t prepared. I sprinted over to the front of the buses with the first place trophy, with our band surrounding me, screaming and cheering like there was no tomorrow. We had done it, we had won. I told them I was proud. Words couldn’t properly explain what I felt at that moment, though. We kissed the trophy, worshiped it. It was truly a feeling that I had never felt before. We did it.

Keep moving forward.
For you, George N. Parks. Eyes with pride.
Congrats, Marching Sequoits. Let’s get ‘em at state.